For the Love of Breastfeeding & Milk Sharing
One of the many joys of having one more baby was that I got to breastfeed again. I love breastfeeding.
I love the bond that is formed between mother and child.
I love the convenience.
I love the cost-effectiveness.
I love the health benefits for both of us.
I love the ease of feeding.
I love that there is no waste.
While I always intended to breastfeed, before having children, I didn’t expect how it would become one of my favorite parts of the baby stage.
Now, I am not in the if you feed your child formula, you are a bad mom camp. In fact, with Elias and Adeline, we began supplementing with formula by the time they were six months old. With working full-time and pumping, my production never seems to keep up and by six months, I simply didn’t have enough milk. (And yes, I have tried everything.)
With Ezra, things are a little different.
He’s seven months and I definitely don’t have enough milk. In fact, my supply is probably the worst it has ever been. Some days I am lucky to pump 2 ounces all day (he needs 9 ounces a day for day care).
But instead of supplementing with formula, we are supplementing with donated breast milk – from my sister, Melissa.
You might remember, our babies are just a month apart. Melissa has never worried about her milk supply. Unlike my two ounces in a day, she gets 15-22 ounces every time she pumps, and she pumps twice a day when she doesn’t work and four times when she does.
She literally has thousands of ounces of milk in her chest freezer – and she has given hundreds of ounces to Ezra. She gave us 80 4-5 ounce bags at the beginning of June. We were down to just a few bags left when we went to Wisconsin last week. She said, “bring an empty cooler and I will give you more milk. She gave us roughly 500 ounces, which will be enough for more than 100 bottles.
I first learned of milk sharing from my friend Sydney, who had hypoplasia/insufficient glandular tissue and couldn’t produce breast milk. She turned to donors when her daughter reacted negatively to formula. (Read her story here.)
While some might think breast milk sharing is weird, I think it is an incredible gift when mothers give of themselves (literally) to help another child in addition to their own. If someone doesn’t have a friend or family member to help them, like I do, several organizations including Human Milk for Human Babies and Eats on Feets can pair donors with families.
For Ezra, he hasn’t seemed to notice a difference between my milk and my sister’s milk. I am so grateful to my sister for all the extra pumping sessions to keep her supply up and ensure she has enough milk for her son and her nephew.
Would you ever consider milk sharing? Have you ever donated milk? Share your story below.
I think it is great that Melissa can do this for you. I am not sure how I would feel about using a service tho (blame it on my advanced maternal age! 😛 ). For me, I was unable to nurse due to thyroid issues-my milk never came in no matter how hard I tried (and we tried everything as well). So, thank you for your aside about mamas who don;t BF. I appreciate it! xoxo
I have donated almost 2000 ounces so far and probably have another 3000 in my freezer right now. I have donated to my sister-in-law a new mom with supply trouble and am currently supplying a little baby that was adopted. My son is not able to nurse due to health issues so I have been exclusively pumping from day 1. In the beginning I wanted to get as much a possible incase my supply didn’t last, but now that we are 9.5 months in and still getting the same ounces per day I have been donating my freezer stash a month at a time. I am so glad that I am not only able to feed my son but help other babies too.
When we got a surprise call from our adoption agency that we had a daughter waiting for us, we also starting receiving offers from friends and friends of friends for donated milk. I was so surprised and overwhelmed (in a good way!) that so many other moms were willing to donate liquid gold so my girl could get the best start nutritionally as possible. Our little preemie 5 pounder is now a happy, chunky 5 month old! 🙂
I just finished nursing my 5 month old and this made me tear up–how lovely!
I donated breast milk to a momma with my second baby. Good for you for helping to normalize breastfeeding and milk sharing.
we fed our adopts daughter exclusively with donor milk for 15 months. She had a medical condition that couldn’t tolerate Formula. She was a whole new baby when we switched her to breastmilk. Milk sharing enabled our daughter to have the healthiest start possible. We are forever grateful.
I planned to pump from day one because I knew I’d need to go to work. My son had trouble latching on and staying awake, so after three weeks, I made the decision to switch to bottle feeding my pumped milk. I pumped every 2-3 hours for months (except at night- only 1-2 times) and had more than he needed. I stored the 10+ extra ounces per day until there was no room in my freezer at home, at work, or in my mom’s freezer. I didn’t want it to go to waste, but I didn’t know what to do with all my extra milk. I went on Facebook hoping people wouldn’t think me too strange and people kindly sent me to the Eats on Feets page and one other. I donated over 1000 ounces (combined) 4 different families. I heard their stories, and how much they wanted to provide for their babies. One mom had her cancer come back, another was on medication, another just didn’t produce enough, and another had adopted (and I found out I went to school with her!). I feel blessed that I was able to help those families.
I, too, really loved breast-feeding. In fact it was one of the things that I mourned the most when I weaned our second daughter! I loved having the opportunity to share donated milk through Human Milk for Human Babies…I probably could’ve sustained five babies! Ha! Not to be too sappy, but I felt honored to be a part of another family’s journey even though we didn’t know each other.
Wow…that’s great that you have such a close resource! I don’t know if I could do that from a stranger. I don’t think it’s weird in a close family/friend relationship, but not knowing the source and how that person cares (or doesn’t) for their body and health would keep me worried!
I love this post! I had twins a little early and was unsuccessful at breastfeeding them. Formula was tough on their tummies, but we didn’t really have any other options. I’m so glad you have this opportunity! Makes me want to organize something in my own community. I love it when moms support other moms.
I supplemented with my friend’s breastmilk until my supply came in completely (around 9 weeks). I was so grateful! I don’t think it’s strange at all. Most people drink milk from COWS, so milk from another human is completely aceptable. 😉
My first wouldn’t nurse, so I double-pumped around the clock for a year and had TONS of milk (though not as much as your sister–wow, that’s amazing!) I froze a lot so my daughter had breastmilk until she was 16 months or so and we were able to donate some. I had good experiences with two strangers and one bad experience that involved shipping a Styrofoam cooler. Happy to help other families, but I recommend keeping it local!
Oh Jess, this post brought a few tears. So incredibly happy that milk sharing (from your sister- SO neat!!!) is part of your story and that you are sharing your positive experience with others. Love you guys!
Love this!!! I love breast feeding and I love the milk sharing concept. My best friend and I had girls 3 days apart and it is so nice knowing that if anything ever happened to me/my supply that Adair would definitely get to keep having breast milk because my bestie would for sure pump extra for her. Such a nice comfort. I had an over supply issue in the beginning so I have a lot of milk in the freezer. I’m keeping it on hand for now until I start back to work (part time) and see how pumping goes there.
Love this! My daughter was premature and received donor milk in the hospital until I had milk. So thankful for the women who donated!
Jess, this is amazing!!! What an amazing gift from your sister! I love the picture above of you both together. Sisterhood!!!
Oh my goodness! What a tremendous blessing for you son, thank you for sharing:)
My sister and I did the same thing. I was so grateful for her extra supply. With another baby, my close friend shared some milk since she produced so much and I didn’t.
My sister did the same for me as yours did for you and I am forever grateful!
I’m all for it! I wish I could share with others or have someone share with me. My sister was in the hospital for 10 days after emergency intestinal surgery, my nephew was 4 weeks old. So many people donated breastmilk to help feed him. I’ve had a breast reduction (shared about it here on IG https://instagram.com/p/6BjIauMlgy/) and would love if I had that option available to me. It’s such an incredible gift.
Love this! I was blessed to have had the opportunity to donate milk to a friend…
My friend’s daughters were both born within a month of my second two sons. She and I weren’t particularly close, but with newborns the same age we started to spend more time together. She struggled through breastfeeding, her milk never fully coming in despite hours of pumping and every desperate remedy in the book. But I on the other hand had way more than enough. So while it felt awkward, I offered her my excess, and was thrilled when she accepted. The first time she came with a cooler to pick up frozen bags of liquid gold it was an emotional moment for us both. It definitely bonded us in a unique way and I was amazed at God’s goodness in the timing of our pregnancies in tandem that I got to do the same thing for her second daughter born two years later. It was a gift to me to give.
I think this is great!! I would do this in a heartbeat if I could. I doubt there will be any more babies in our future but if there are and I can, I would definitely donate. I have twins, and then 2 singletons after that. When our twins were born I started pumping, while they learned how to nurse and I learned how to be a mommy. I ended up breastfeeding exclusively two babies and pumping so much that we didn’t have room for all of the milk in our main freezer.
I think your Ezra has had a huge gift from his Aunt Melissa. And how blessed you are to have such an amazing sister who can and is willing to share the gift!
Although I have not pumped to share, I have nursed a few of my nephews. Also when my 4 month old daughter was in in the hospital for two weeks my younger sister traveled with her kids in order to “wet nurse” my daughter as I took a break and went home to see my 3 little boys. This did freak the doctors out a bit though. I am forever grateful for her support.
I think this is great… I have twins and when I wasn’t able to produce enough milk during the firest 2 weeks I was very greatful to my cousin for her precious gift of milk for my newborns. I hope to one day be in the position to pay it forward as well! At first I thought it was wierd, but we drink bovine boob juice? Is my cousin more gross than a cow? I would also give my babies a blood transfusion or an organ transplant if they needed it. Why would I not give my babies milk from a trusted and/or quality tested source in order to give them antibodies which is NOT in formula? I am very proud/grateful that I have been able to produce enough to be just barely ahead on my supply. Thank you for shedding light on this topic so that we can give our babies the best start ever with out public shame! 🙂
What a lovely story. I had to supplement 2/3 of my kids with formula – would have loved to use donor milk instead, and would also have loved to be able to donate! Our NICU has a donor program which I think is wonderful to help those fragile babies get the best start.
My daughter had issues with latching and
I wasn’t able to produce enough thru pumping to sustain her. I would have loved to have had the opportunity to use donor milk rather than having to use formula.
Great post ! I donated to my best friend when she brought home her triplets 4 months after my second born.